Please excuse the screen in this pic. I wasn't going outside to get a better pic. More on this later.
Let's start with the Pretty Awesome Nickname. I saw Dr. Baltz today. He asked how I was doing. When I told him that I didn't have any nausea, vomiting, or diarrhea; that my energy was good but I tire more easily; my appetite generally was good; and that I was still working out with my personal trainer, he said, "Well look at you, Doctor Freaky Starchild!" I ABSOLUTELY LOVED THAT!!! He started out calling me "Princess", but I think he soon realized that I am far from a princess. Yes, I am a Child of the King, but we all know he wasn't talking about that kind of princess. More like a Disney princess, and I am far from that. Oh yeah, I can embrace Dr. Freaky Starchild!
This next part actually happened last night, but we'll just throw it in with what happened today because, well, you'll see why. Most of you know that I am blind. Seriously, I am legally blind without my glasses. Haven't been able to see the big "E" on the top of the eye chart for decades. Couldn't read a road sign unless I face planted it while driving down the highway. You get the picture. Well, last night I dropped my glasses, and the left lens popped out. I walked around feeling like a pirate with only one good eye. I guess Dr. Freaky Starchild could be a pirate. I tried to pop it back in with no luck. Probably didn't try hard enough, but oh well. Jadyn popped it back in for me today, so my days of swashbuckling and riding the high seas plundering and pillaging have to be put on the back burner. I will be on a boat on the Amazon River in less than 3 weeks, so that will have to count.
Now, this next part is me being REAL. I mean incredibly real. Just remember that some of you have been encouraging me to be real, so if you read this and think "TMI!!!"(Too Much Information), just keep in mind that you may be one of the ones who encouraged this very thing. I did talk with my friend, Kerry (breast cancer survivor 9 years and counting), about whether to blog about this, and she said most definitely because people need to know just what all cancer takes away from you, like your dignity and whatever pride you may have left. So, blame her! LOL!!! (Seriously, if you don't want "that kind" of information, skip the next paragraph and pick up after the 3 photos.)
I was in my marathon chemo treatment today. When they were changing out IV bags, I decided to take a potty break. Nothing urgent. Nothing pressing. Just a regular pee. Or so I thought. I drug my IV pole in the bathroom, closed and locked the door, and as soon as I saw the toilet, my bladder took on a mind of its own, promptly lost its newly acquired ever lovin' mind, and thought "NOW!!!" To my astonishment, it began to empty itself RIGHT THEN! I managed to get my shorts off without their being soiled, and I sat on the toilet without getting anything in the floor, but I had just full on peed myself. So, I took off my NEW UNDIES, folded them in paper towels, placed them in the trash can, washed my hands, and drug my IV pole back to my chair for another bag. BRING IT ON!!! I am going commando here! If it happens again, I'll be Porky Piggin' it the rest of the day!!! My kidneys must be working great because those fluids made me pee 6 more times!!! My backpack will go with me from now on. See, I didn't have it because I have been worried about diarrhea but haven't had any. Nobody told me I my might pee myself. So, pay attention because I am telling you. If you ever have to go through chemo, never trust a fart or an urge to pee, even a regular pee. You, too, could be in danger of Porky Piggin' for it the rest of the day.
Now, for me to get to the tree.
While I was hooked up to chemo, I received a call from my lovely next-door neighbor. No, I am not being facetious. She truly is one of the sweetest neighbors I have ever had. We had a storm in Malvern, and that hideous demon tree known as a Bradford Pear that was in my back yard that I absolutely hated blew down on my fence and into their yard. It knocked down their power line. Mine was ok because it fell away from my house. Neither house was damaged. Thank You God! I called Jadyn, and he went to Malvern to check things out until I could get there. He was going to clear it, but Entergy had not come to address the downed power lines. They just got here a few minutes ago, and they will take care of that and some limbs from the pecan tree that are threatening my lines. God bless them. Jadyn will be here tomorrow to finish the rest. Me? I will be inside with a bag o' chemo around my neck being absolutely no help whatsoever. Yeah, that's a tough pill to swallow. The last time I had one of the large limbs break off, I cleared it all with a handheld Silky Saw. Now I can't even drag a limb with this thing around my neck. Another bit of pride swallowed.
So, to recap my last 24 hours:
I became a pirate
I got a pretty awesome new nickname
I peed myself
And my tree pooped the bed
Oh, yeah, by the way, I went to the bathroom before leaving the infusion center. I decided that was NOT a trashcan but a soiled undergarment holding container. Yep, I retrieved those new damp undies from the holding container, hid them between a book and my lab report, washed my hands, walked right out of the infusion center, and brought them home to wash. As I said, I ain't got no pride left. LOL!!!
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